Monday, March 2, 2009

A few signs that you may be knitting-obsessed




  1. You've contemplated naming your children and/or pets any of the following: Knit, Purl, Frog, Rowan, Malabrigo, Cascade, McPhee, Addi, Dolores, Bob, Freckle Girl, Lime, Violet..
  2. When hugging your SO, you quickly take a 'hands' measurement of the width of his/her shoulders so you know how wide to make his/her sweater
  3. You have more pictures of your FOs than of your children
  4. A co-worker sees a picture of your family on your desk and comments, "How adorable." And you say, "Thanks. I knit that sweater with Noro and I just love how it worked up."
  5. You judge your friends by whether or not they are 'sock-worthy'
  6. When you walk into your LYS, they all know your name (Like Norm from Cheers)
  7. Your personalized credit card has a picture of your knitting on it
  8. You've friended Franklin Habit, Vickie Howell, Eunny Jang... on Facebook
  9. You've also friended them on Twitter
  10. You're in line at the bank and it's finally your turn. You signal to the bank teller that you'll be with her in a minute once you finish the row
  11. Your friends and family have started calling you 'Crazy Yarn Lady' behind your back
  12. You know they call you this behind your back and love it!
  13. You friends have closets lined with couture and your closet is full of yarn
  14. Your friend shows off her latest Kate Spade handbag and you show off your new Namaste bag
  15. Your daughter needs to have her hair put up for her ballet recital and you can't find any combs or clips. You put her hair up using DPNs and stress to her that she can't lose them!
  16. You belong to 25+ Ravelry groups
  17. You try to recruit everyone you meet to come over to the dark side
  18. You read about it; blog about it; talk about it; and tweet about it
  19. You're being treated for knitting elbow
  20. Your hubby suggests you buy "something sexy for tonight." You buy a gorgeous silk-cashmere blend yarn and CO right away.
  21. You have Knitty Gritty, Knit & Crochet Today, and Knitting Daily on season pass on your TiVo
  22. As you're watching movies, you're reverse-engineering all of the knitwear you see on the screen
  23. You're in an airport and spot both Brad Pitt and Stephanie Pearl-McPhee. You can only stalk one of them for their autograph. You choose the Harlot because she may be able to help you with your gusset problem.
  24. You think there should be PSAs about the dangers of moths
  25. You absolutely believe that if world leaders and heads of state would all knit, the world would be a peaceful and better place
  26. You think World Wide Knit in Public Day should be a holiday
  27. You've started decorating your house with your knitting supplies and yarn because you no longer have any place to stash it.
  28. Your hubby turns to you and asks you what 'stash' means. You slap him Dynasty-style and tell him that if you have to tell him then he obviously doesn't know you at all.
  29. You find yourself wanting to fondle complete strangers' sweaters
  30. You have 10 knitting Podcasts on your iPod at any given time
  31. You feel so badly for your newly sheared sheep that you knit them sweaters
  32. You whole-heartedly believe that an Alpaca would make a terrific house pet
  33. You research available treatments for second sock syndrome
  34. You frequently quote The Yarn Harlot
  35. 3/4 of your friends knit
  36. You feel as though you've won the lottery when someone comments on your FO in Ravelry
  37. You feel like a total rock star if more than 5 people visit your knitting blog in a day
  38. You've knit your hubby a wallet-cosy
  39. You husband whispers knitting patterns in your ear in place of sweet nothings
  40. You think that knitting is a privilege, not a right
  41. You're convinced that God WANTS you to knit in church
  42. You know when your 'knitterversary' is
  43. The kids have no clean clothes. There's no food in the pantry. AND you haven't seen the living room floor in a month. But you've finished your sweater!! (And a few little sweaters for the dust bunnies that have taken up residence under your furniture.)
  44. You dream about laying in a bed of wool (think 'American Beauty')
  45. You haven't bought yarn in a month and your LYS, credit card company, and bank all call to see if you're okay.
  46. You knit presents based on how much you like the recipient: Scarf= I tolerate you. Socks = you're a pretty good friend Lace = I trust you with my life
  47. Your Christmas wishlist looks like the menu bar of WEBS
  48. You've made a blanket out of your gauge swatches
  49. You absolutely will NOT pay $80 for a sweater that you can make yourself for $200
  50. You get regular manicures.. not for vanity's sake but because your nails are snagging your yarn.
  51. Not only do you count sheep at night.. you count skeins
  52. Your psychologist keeps saying, "I think you're knitting-obsessed."
  53. You're a firm believer that yarn is the universal language
  54. You're less interested in who will star in "Friday Night Knitting Club" and more interested in what yarns will be featured.
  55. You've knit a sweater for your child's guinea pig
  56. You know the entire history of Aran knitting.. American History, not so much
  57. You have a bumper sticker that reads, "A skein is a terrible thing to waste."
  58. You secretly wish there were knitting soap operas
  59. Everytime you see a celeb knitting in a pic OR a movie or commercial depicting someone knitting, you post it on your blog and/or Facebook.
  60. While shopping in the produce isle, you wonder if Malabrigo makes sock yarns in all of those colors
  61. More people know your Ravelry name than your real name
  62. You go out to eat at a Chinese restaurant and procede to rip your napkin into strips and knit with your chop sticks
  63. You've switched from paper books to audio books so that reading doesn't impede progress of your socks
  64. You have your LYS on speed dial
  65. You switch your college major to Bachelor of Fine Arts in hopes you'll get to knit more
  66. You find ways to incorporate knitting into your lesson plans (teachers)
  67. Your Weight Watchers Leader checks your daily planner to see what might be derailing your weight loss and sees that you've assigned 10 activity points to knitting..


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25 comments:

  1. I love it!! I'm aligned with more of those than I would ever admit to anyone.... particularly 16, 18, 22, 30, 36, 42 and 61!!

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  2. tooo funny... I am guilty of more than I care to admit♥

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  3. ROTFLMAO - I can relate to way too many of them!

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  4. I'm not sharing how many fit me. :-X

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  5. Yes, I definitely saw myself in a lot of these! Scary!

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  6. In my opnion you save the best for the last!!! That got a HUGE LOL out of me. I've been a WW since 1983

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  7. OMG! I didn't realize how bad I was til you actually made a list. I hate to tell you how many of your list quotes applies to me. It's scarry!!!

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  8. I am totally guilty of #29. I do it all the time.

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  9. I laughed so hard that I spit coffee onto my monitor!! Thanks for this, it's great and not to mention that each and everyone applies to me LOL!!

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  10. I had to refrain from laughing *too* hard since I'm at work, but OMG! I think the one that put me over the edge is not buying $80 sweaters, but gladly knitting one for $200. So true :)
    Thanks for putting it into perspective!

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  11. Oh these are so funny! I cracked up at the $80 sweater one too. And #20 made me laugh out loud too. Thank you for the laugh!

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  12. I love them and will have to post them on my blog if it is okay.

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  13. These are so true! I thought I'd add some more (that I may actually be guilty of):

    You've taught your non-knitting friends how to use a swift and ball winder.

    You've also taught your non-knitting friends how to identify yarn weight just by looking at a picture.

    When someone says, "How the sweater/scarf/sock going?" you reply, "Which one?"

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  14. Wow, apparently I am knitting obsessed...The one about reverse engineering sweaters I see in movies hit me pretty hard! Funny!

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  15. so wonderful! Had to put a link to this in my blog!

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  16. That is hysterical! I especially like #46 - so true!

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  17. Love it! And guilty of too many of these!!!

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  18. I had to laugh because I recently went to see " The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo" and after the movie I was talking to my daughter about the knitted hats many of the characters were wearing. She gave me a funny look and said she hadn't noticed they were wearing hats! Thanks for showing me I'm not crazy...or maybe I am! :-)

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  19. It's scary how true this all is!

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  20. Most of what was said unfortunatley applied to me. Too funny and too true!

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